Aries March 21 - April 19

This week is will be full of joy and laughter, because nothing else seems to be synching up. Stressed? Just laugh it off.  You won't have time to stress out if you are constantly laughing.  Your laugh is contagious, so others will join in.  Remind them its a cult. Appoint a leader. (Which will probably be you, because you don't shirk responsibility, and are a much better leader than follower.) and keep on laughing. All the way to the looney bin. 

Taurus April 20 - May 20

A coworker catches you staring and smiles back. Six times. You must make a choice, approach, or be approached. Well, creepy McCreeperson, I'd not be the one to make that move-let them meet you half way.  It may be Human Resources reaching out on their behalf, but hey! They noticed you.. Didn't they?!

Gemini May 21 - June 21

Don't let people shit talk your poor life choices. Especially your bad picker. No one completely chooses wisely; most just like to deflect and put the focusing iris on others. Well, blind those judgey gossips by making even bolder and reckless choices. That will show them! 

Cancer June 22 - July 22

This week you will be a socialite.  You are extremely comforting this week. People just seem to flock to you.  Now is the right time to start a cult.  Find an Aries to lead. Your cult will become a success. 

Leo July 23 - August 22

Boldly go where you haven't before.  Go hang out, or lurk in random places. Explore a store that catches your eye.  Who knows... If it is Lowe's, you may find your dream date in there!

Virgo August 23 - September 22

Dissonance will be a theme for you this week. You will suddenly find that some people around you are unbearable.  That is because you are only seeing things through your own lens...not theirs. Stop judging! It must get pretty exhausting rolling your eyes like that. Healthy debate is one thing.. But being disagreeable just to disagree is jut annoying. Find another hobby this week. 

Libra September 23 - October 22

Material; items bore the shit out of you this week. Spending money is hard work. it reminds you that you spend too much without thinking sometimes.  Start another project. That seems to be soothing lately. 

Scorpio October 23 - November 21

Here comes that subtle sledgehammer. That TNT splashed with an arsenal of arsenic, and lava ready to hit the target you hone in on.  When someone idiot decides to hit you up with some gossip, just tell them to knock it off. The dramatics this week will not amuse you, and it shouldn't. People can just be ignorant sometimes. Just laugh it off, and go hide. Think of it as toxic hide and seek, and hide with the intent of never being found at work. 

Sagittarius November 22 - December 21

Compromise has never really been your thing. Hang out with people. Do some things. Try to be generous. Or not.  ;P

Capricorn December 22 - January 19

Get ready to act! You are going to be center stage because just watching the drama unfold isn't enough. You have be the lead, the director, and the entire cast.  You're loudness is amplified. You get worked up over the smallest of things.  Just go hide someplace. 

Aquarius January 20 - February 18

Don't let others steamroll you. Speak up. Just as others have a right to be heard, you have a right your opinion as well. Encourage others individuality, and self expression, and revel in your own. You have a lot to offer this world. 

Pisces February 19 - March 20

Your love life has been as dead in the water as you have felt this last week.  Your luck could change today. You may be netted by someone who is smarter than the average bear, only it may just be a bear.  Hope your wit is faster than your  intellect this week.